Re: Translation exercise - children

Irina Rempt <ira@...> wrote:
> I got this from the egroups website a while ago and finally got
> around to having a go at it. I couldn't discover who posted it
> (snipped the text from a response) sorry! It resonates with things
> I've recently been writing about Valdyan culture - it could be a text
> for the feast day of Timoine, the goddess of beginnings.
>=20
> >    "a great freedom for all the children, and that they won't tell
> >    us what to eat and what to think. that they won't ask us to do
> >    what we don't want to, and that they won't say things that we
> >    don't understand. that all the children will go up into the
> >    trees and that all the adults will become small!"
This is the text in Drasele'q. Note that `, ', ^ are really
a grave, an accute, and a circumflex over the previous vowel,
showing long vowel, stress, and stressed long vowel, resp.
Default stress goes on the penult.

<q> =3D /q/
<th> =3D /T/
<dh> =3D /D/
<u"> =3D <=FC> (u diaeresis) =3D /y/


"On dhidhanthn i qlonval nertain. Siarn fraburfu'dhdimberaqai
ima'lataut qenthn, ka'ladaut qenthn. Lip siar fragi'mnilimberaqai
gu'fataut bu"rrn fraradhut bu"nd, taus frabu'rsimperaiek i=20
lima^rth franavut b=FCntth. Ma`sstu"r roto'vneraiek on dhidhanth
mi endhi'totseraiek on tiosst!"


Taken apart:

On  dhidhanthn  i qlonval nertain.
all children.OB * great   freedom

Siarn fraburfu'dhdimberaqai
we.OB not.be-commanded.SUBJ.FUT.3s

ima'lataut  qenthn, ka'ladaut     qenthn.=20
eat.FUT.1p+ what-OB think.FUT.1p+ what.OB

Lip  siar fragi'mnilimberaqai
from we   not.be-requested.SUBJ.FUT.3s

gu'fataut  bu"rrn fraradhut    bu"nd,
do.FUT.1p+ it.OB  not-want.1p+ it.OB.REL

taus frabu'rsimperaiek       i lima^rth  franavut    b=FCntth.
and  not.be-said.SUBJ.FUT.3p * things.OB not-get.1p+ them.OB.REL

Ma`sstu"r roto'vneraiek     on  dhidhanth
trees.LOC go-up.SUBJ.FUT.3p all children

mi  endhi'totseraiek          on  tiosst!"
and make-small.MV.SUBJ.FUT.3p all adults


OB =3D objective case; usually accusative, but
     dative in constructions with two objects.
SUBJ =3D subjuntive mode
FUT =3D future tense
REL =3D relativization (mostly for pronouns)
LOC =3D locative case
MV =3D middle voice

* =3D the particle <i> is used to mark the direct object
in ditransitive verbs ("give STHG to sbdy"), and also as
a kind of partitive (like French "de, des").


To Irina: I used passive voice ("let us not be told")
instead of the general "they" ("that they won't tell us").
I'm not sure if this indirectness was what the author of
the text was after. The "they" construction is more
informal and perhaps more suitable for a cheerful tone.
But in Drasele'q there's a tendency towards the passive
voice, so I chose to respect my own rules. If "they"
are actually the adults and there's a need for emphasis,
it's OK to use the original form.=20


--Pablo Flores