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Re: Non-stereotypical elves was Re: Quick Intro

From:Mike Ellis <nihilsum@...>
Date:Friday, February 21, 2003, 0:30
Peter Clark wrote:

> I hate elves. Seriously. (Yes, I know they are imaginary. But I
hate
>imaginary elves.) They are always the same in modern fantasy and RPGs.
I agree. And the fact that they aren't even that great of an idea doesn't seem to discourage everyone from using them again and again and again. Might be interesting if someone (maybe an heir to JRRT or something) managed to claim original copyright over the whole That-Kind-Of-Elf concept: maybe then fantasy writers would have to try a fresh idea. (yeah, and maybe some day it will actually rain Skittles like in the ad)
>Wise >to the point of being absolute elitist snobs. Practically immortal, yet
throw
>themselves into situations that are likely to get themselves killed. (Think >about it: if you were practically immortal, wouldn't you be more careful?) >Beautiful to the point that authors trip over themselves with adjectives.
Well, They might not be more CAREFUL. Picture living so long that you begin to get sick of life itself. Not having the nerve to actually kill yourself, you start risking your life in supposedly "heroic" ways. But as for ugly elves, I agree it's really odd that you've got an entire race of people who live for thousands of years and not ONCE has any of them really let himself go. An ugly elf is LONG overdue.
>You know what I want? I want fat, ugly elves with bad breath and even worse >manners. I want elves that get drunk frequently on cheap booze and are
angry
>drunks at that, too....
<snip> You mean like Santa's elves? I imagine a low-paid factory job in a freezing cold wasteland would knock those elves down a notch. M