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a bad essay

From:Campbell Nilsen <cactus95@...>
Date:Friday, February 6, 2009, 1:30
I don't know if this is a hoax.  
Have a field day with this one. 

This essay was written by an 8th grader in Pittsburgh in the spring of 2004. The
assignment was to pick an endangered species and explain why it's important to
save it. The typos and formatting are preserved from the original.

Richard XXXXXXXX Draft 2

I shouldn't do shit. I don't care about them they all could die and it won't
affect my life. I know a lot about them but I don't need to think about them.
They're just a waste of time koalas are stupid they don't help me with shit so
why should I help them. If they all die there will be more room for the
panthers and all the other hard animals. Koalas are weak a pit will get rid of
their whole fucking family. That's why I don't like koalas.

Koalas have sharp claws but they are weak. They all small and fat and they be climing
trees. I hope a storm just come while theyjust chilling up in the tree thinking
they is hard and they're will all just fall off. They just break they neck and
shit. When they fall they claws are going to fall off and they going to be
crying like some little bitches.

Koalas aren't hard they some little bitches. They start climbing up the tree soon as
they see a deer from like 50feet away. They stupid as hell they should put
their brain in their pouch and put the kid in they ten they're be able to think
better. They try to be in the fucking kangaroo family. They weak as hell,
talking bout they got a pouch a kangaroo so they their cousins and shit.
Kangaroo's have some big ass legs and whot do a koala got? Some little ass
legs, they tails is little and weak as fuck kangaroo's got a big ass long tail
that can kill a fucking koala.

If a koala goes in the water it won't be able to breathe with its little short
ass. It'd fucking drown soon aas it take one step into the water. While they at
the river trying to get something to drink a bear could just come to him and
snatch its ass up. It doesn't know protection because they don't have
protection. What they little ass going to do? It can't scratch him. The bear will beat his
fucking ass.

The important think about koalas is that just don't care about tem and let them
die by all the other animals in Australia. They're not important just let
nature do what it do and kill them. Koalas do not have a place in this world
there's not enough room for all the bitches in this world. So let all the
koalas that's in the zoos and shit. Let them go and put them back with their
family. If you let them all go they won't nothing except for that's what they
was put in this world for.

Now you know why koalas aren't important. They have nothing to do except for
sitting around in the trees. It's like they just was like they was sent have to
die. Koalas don't do nothing to help anybody. Thre would be just one more
relative of the kangaroo that will be six feet under. Now you know why koalas
are not important because there are dumb

"Define 'cynical'."-M. Mudd


Vincent Pistelli <pva003@...>