Re: POETRY: translations anyone(s)?

My replies never end up in the thread, no matter what is
in the topic line. So whoever originally posted these poems
will never see the translation. Yay for technology!
Anyway, for a language like Rhean, which is a posteriori
as all get-out, these didn't cause as many problems as
I expected. The sentence structure is a bit weird, since
Rhean doesn't allow some of the mid-sentence breaks used
in these poems -- particularly in SOV clauses.

BLACK LEONARD IN NEGATIVE SPACE

All that surrounds the cat
is not the cat, is all
that is not the cat, is all,
is everything, except the animal.
It will rejoin without a seam
when he is dead. To know
that no-space is to know
what he does not, that time
is space for love and pain.
He does not need to know it.

I HILC'IKSOI MAKANOM KYOR LENARD. (1)

Nui nastrud basom c'e
bas deg'e, cemuie
nui bas deg'e c'e, cemuie c'e,
paikui c'e, yu'ca egva.
Bez raabada zainaihokir (2)
c'orod s'iniv c'e.
Eya mi-makan s'iznek, nuin (3)
ta mu s'iznis' s'iznek c'e, du krono (4)
ver kalket ki derpu makan c'e.
S'iznek mu laazas'.

(1) Yes, it's Leonard, not leopard. I looked it up.
Lucky for me too: they don't have leopards in Rhea
(they're probably extinct, gone the way of the elephant).
"Negative" was a bit odd... the only connotation of this
word that I had in my lexicon was "bad" etc. So I used
"inside-out space".

(2) "It will come back together without (visible) joint."
I haven't made a word for "seam" yet.

(3) No-space? This was a bit odd... I don't know if
|mi-makan| "un-space" really works. Perhaps the meaning
is more like |makana ök'red| "lack of space"?

(4) Recognise this word?

-------------------------------------

A CONVERSATION WITH A SILENCE

What kept you out so late my love?

I was running, I was running in the dark.

Dawn and raining when you came home.

The trees are clouds and roads to me.
I run the sweet dirt-darkness in the rain
and up where leafy chirping sleep-warmths
nestle their blood for me. I meet my enemies
below: the White One, the Singer.

What does your brother watch from the window?

Ghosts in the other garden.
I don't see ghosts. I go farther
along the cloud-roads
to kill where darkness branches in the rain.

SO LIKLIBAM BAZHAT

U enie somut kui lon tenios', a kalke?

Haz'aim, i dulmadom haz'aim.

Kota ki amöz dorod ödoriot.

Bolami yak'em oble ki samti.
I amözom o slaan griezec' dulmad haz'am (1)
ki nudom c'ijizna licbas' nümokaisbi (2)
ver yat tei c'erek propuk'kaz. Yai düsmin
fesom strec'am: bes'erurz, ganatnik.

U vadam tai frat kuin tirza?

I k'okec' ujinom gilzin.
Gilzin mu mirim. Üs'akyanu yuram
nap oblosamtim
ver kros'eku nudom dulmad i amözom s'ugasprastis'. (3)

(1) "Dirt-darkness"? Maybe "dark like dirt", |mik griez
dulma|. I don't know. I used "dirty darkness".
(2) "Leafy chirping sleep-warmths": you sadist! I don't
know if this makes sense in either language. I'm in no
rush to include the bastard word |nümokaisbi| in the
dictionary.
(3) "Where darkness branches in the rain" I've used
|nudom dulmad i amözom s'ugasprastis'| "where darkness,
in the rain, sends out branches".

Something is definitely lost in translation.
Maybe I translated them too literally.

NS

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