Re: O Zeyly Nibro Nizzemfon

Sally Caves <scaves@...> wrote:

> This one is easier and shorter than Verimak.
> It's by the same author of the Verimak original,
> and by far more well-known to fans of this poet:
> I'm sure you could probably guess it just from
> the glossary.  This is for Matthias, who wanted
> another translation exercise to try his new
> construction out.  I don't think I have omitted
> any words, this time, but it's late.
=DCodel kroqgn i velvith fna
varsar gian uldid;
lif pon smalkigth
i th=E8l g=FC'ftotot;
Donth lunmith=20
qeq b=FCtth pon gef.
Aus lif porr na vequit freth
kram drast=E8n
rroses dhenerrn s=E4n
na r=E1tsaisentan
ausnaffavdel rath.
On fanth nuldas smokek
pon briguann
"Len lan..."
Tolen a! T=F3lenenev famp!
"Len lan lal!"


  =DCodel      kroqgn i   velvith fna
  completely nine   PRT yards   down =20

  varsar      gian uldid;
  lie.STAT.3s your father

This part was obscure to me; I hope it's OK.
Anyway, I have "yards" of 0.932 m, so I used
"nine yards" instead of "five man-heights".
I added _fna_ "down(ward)" to show it's a
depth measure.
The verb _varsar_ is explicitly STATic here;
the other way it would have seemed as if your
father had lied (laid? lay? damned those, I never
remember!) himself.


  lif  pon smalkigth
  from his bones

_smalk_ "skeleton"; -ig shows one member of a
larger group.


  i   th=E8l  g=FC'ftotot;
  PRT coral do.MV.DUP.3s

Surprisingly, I had a word for "coral"!
Note the middle voice, "Coral is forming".


  Donth lunmith
  those pearls

  qeq      b=FCtth    pon gef.
  be.3pPST they.REL his eyes

"Those pearls, which were his eyes."
Is that it?


  Aus lif  porr na vequit freth
  out from he   to waste  nothing

_vequit_ is more like "remains, leftovers, thing
set aside, rest", but "leftovers" seemed a bit macabre
to talk about a person.
The verb isn't here, but it's coming soon.

  kram   drast=E8n
  except crossing

"crossing" =3D "going thru, enduring"
The long active participle is usually enough
to render a "by -ing" construction.


  rroses  dhenerrn   s=E4n
  sea.GEN change.ACC go.3s

"A change of the sea"... pretty meaningless,
but that's the way it goes. And here's the
verb at last.


  na r=E1tsaisentan
  to exalted.FML

Broken down (VE =3D verb ending, FML =3D formal register)
rat-------s--ai--s--entan
make_high VE FML VE PassiveParticiple
It works quite like Japanese verb changes, e.g. -su > -simasu.


  ausnaffavdel  rath.
  extraordinary something

  On  fanth nuldas smokek
  all this  hour   strike.3p

_On fanth_ + sing.noun =3D "each"

  pon briguann
  his bell.ACC

This is a new word, brig- "bronze" + -muan "tube, pipe"
(not exactly a bell but those hanging tubes...)


  "Len lan..."

  Tolen a!  T=F3lenenev   famp!
  hear  VOC hear.DUP.1s now

Well, here's my solution to this kind of imperative,
the verb root + the VOCative particle _a_.


  "Len lan lal!"


And that's it. Not difficult, really, but I have to
say I had more fun with "Verimak". Not that I'd like
that kind of fun every day... ;)


--Pablo Flores