Re: Further stanza's and a melody

On Fri, 23 Apr 1999, FFlores wrote:

>=20
> Well, I couldn't match the melody, but anyway, here
> are the other stanzas in Drasel=E9q:
>=20
Wow!

>=20
> _ar=F3sfar=ECn_ "snow" is borrowed, hence its strange long
> sound. The Dr=E1selhadh had never seen snow before coming to
> the new lands; the Biy=FAza, to the south, named it like that
> and then the word spread. In proper Drasel=E9q the word would
> have been _lostfl=ECn_, from the same roots, lost- "cold" and
> _fl=ECn_ "rain".
>=20
You did realize 'snowdrop' is another flower, did you?

>=20
> Sero  lesha lodha perve
> 1sHGH fresh like  snowdrop
> Per plens    ar=F3sfar=ECnerg sar
> cos green.1s snow.COMP    I
>=20
> _plens_ "I am green" in the sense of "unripe"
> (the green colour is _dimel_)
>=20
In this case, 'lesha', does not mean unripe: it is related to
'laush', 'water', and is intended to evoke the unspoiled
freshness of a mountain spring (the watery kind, not the
seasonal one). It has also nothing to do with virginity, which
is not prized by the Charyans, but with the ability to express
a spontaneous pleasure.

>=20
> Sero  xixi   lodha s=FCve
> 1sHGH tender like  poppy
> Per runet       q=E1isinderg     sar
> cos delicate.1s redflower.COMP I
>=20
> _runet_=3D "I'm delicate, I'm like a drawing made
> with a fine point pen" (sort of).
>=20
That's almost the right sense; 'xixi' contains
that meaning, but also the delicateness of, for instance,
a butterfly: touch it, and it's gone.

>=20
> Phew! It was hard, but fun. And it's a beautiful
> song. I really have to congratulate you -- I've never
> been able to write a good song or poem, let alone in
> a foreign language, let alone with a melody!
>=20
Your compliments make me blush - something which readers
of some of the other Charyan poetry I have produced wouldn't=20
have thought me capable of... On the other hand, I have an=20
heard an expert opinion[1] that it is actually easier to write
poetry in a foreign language than in your own because all
the words are fresh.

[1] By Lloyd Haft, an American who lives in the Netherlands
and writes Dutch poetry. He tried to teach me Chinese.

Boudewijn Rempt  | www.xs4all.nl/~bsarempt