Re: New Conlang-to-conlang translation project

Nik Taylor <fortytwo@...> wrote:4

> I actually cheated on this, as I originally wrote it in English, and
> then translated it into Waty=E1=EDsa, but I've worked on eliminating En=
glish
> traces from it, plus its in a Sutty=E1=EDsai context.  So, without furt=
her
> ado, here's the beginning of _Wapatisagg=E1 tiKast=E1n=E1f_
Well, here it is. It was interesting and it provided me
some new words that popped out quite spontaineously.
And it wasn't terribly hard, after I deciphered the
grammar codes :)


=C4mol qoromp, koh=FCr gadaq Kastan=E1. Taraq fanth k=F2.
F=FClenq fratureq kram Lapit=E1n mur=E0non =E9lashandh.
=DCmol rin ftauvain ar=FCq Tinan=ED. Traitheq kaf kerrn,
da kerr aileq taus. I ingimanth on m=E8v=FCr,=20
selkorag taus qgedaq kerr ken elvans.
I rr=E9nvelaq talt=F3l m=E8v=FCr qgedn=E8n enth=E4saq m=FCl
ken elvans, mi m=FCl ken tenmevnien m=E8v=FCr tenmevaq.
Fanth m=E8b=FCr na utetsom drigeq ken vidh,
tel nailaq enku=F3roreq i tark=FCl Vlam=EDes satratson.

"A vel dhibios! Qes anth qenth? F=FC'lalier=20
frarenku=F3roratier fanth satratson, taus i gi=F2rr
frat=E1dovaqai ked kers fanth satratsor!"

Da kerr kith ailtieq.

"Dha! Vel nian elasst frar=E1r Vlam=ED. Qes =FAnfiadhes=20
mi tengrutek b=FCtthes elvas."

Nan=FC'ftotaq.

"Sik=E9lav=FCt, da sar kith sirailser tadh. G=ECn en=20
sar g=FC'ftotatat onthn." Enmanaq b=FCrrn, kram=20
kiandien =E0qgn sifarhondanq b=FCd, mi =EDdhkosaq=20
enkuortonn.

Aus lif ken gi=F2rr s=E4q.



---------------------------------------------------------
Interlinear gloss
---------------------------------------------------------

=C4mol qoromp,    koh=FCr    gadaq      Kastan=E1.
ago  long_time  town.LOC live.3sPST Kast=E1n=E1

I think your <=E1> has high tone... I've used stress
to imitate it. A final stressed open syllable in
a polysyllabic word is extremely rare in Drasel=E9q,
but it could be possible in compounds. BTW what is
the meaning of "Kast=E1n=E1"?

PS  I just saw Irina's translation and it seems she
got "the village of Kast=E1n=E1". I gathered that Kast=E1n=E1
was the name of the woman... Am I right?


Taraq      fanth k=F2.
evil.3sPST this  town

F=FClenq     fratureq       kram   Lapit=E1n    mur=E0non   =E9lashandh.
stop.3pANT NEG.love.3pPST except Lap=EDt=E1.ACC other.all god.GRP.ACC

Note: _=E9lashandh_ /'e.las.hanD/. The accusative mark, -n-,
is infixed to the group plural mark, -hadh.=20
Note the verb series, "They had stopped they didn't love".
There's a literal way to say "They had stopped loving"
(_f=FClenq tursen_ "they-had-stop to-love") but that could
mean (if no subject is stated after the infinitive)
something like "they had stopped the loving".


=DCmol  rin  ftauvain     ar=FCq     Tinan=ED.
still with worship_mood be.3sPST tiNan=ED

I kept your gender mark... It looked a lot like an article
to me (I know it's not) and I preferred not to translate
it literally as "the mother" or "the elderly woman".
The word _ftauvain_ is an abstract noun that comes from=20
the stem FTAW- meaning "worship, cult" and the verb
"to worship (in an organized fashion), to attend religious
services", etc.=20


Traitheq   kaf        kerrn,  da      kerr aileq       taus.
mock.3pPST the_others she.ACC against she  laugh.3pPST also

"Laugh against" means "laugh at" with a despective tone.


I   ingimanth on  m=E8v=FCr,   selkorag taus qgedaq     kerr ken elvans.
PRT prayers   all days.LOC oil      also give.3sPST she  her goddess.ACC

_selkorag_ properly means "perfumed oil"; I think it
fits in the religious mood of the story, doesn't it?


I   rr=E9nvelaq talt=F3l m=E8v=FCr    qgedn=E8n enth=E4saq     m=FCl  ken=
 elvans,
PRT meat*     sacred days.LOC giving  please.3sPST only her goddess.ACC
"She pleased only her goddess, (by) giving her meat on sacred days"

*_rr=E9nvelaq_ means "meat from a four legged animal", i. e.
red meat. The concept of sacrifying animals is alien to the
Dr=E1selhadh; they offer aromatic scents and herbs to be burned,
among other things.


mi  m=FCl  ken tenmevnien   m=E8v=FCr    tenmevaq.
and only her RFX.hold.OBJ days.LOC RFX.hold.3sPST

_tenmevnen_ "to hold oneself" is the usual idiom for "to fast"
(among other types of abstinence). The OBJective infinitive
is used as an adjective, "her in-order-to-fast days".


Fanth m=E8b=FCr   na utetsom    drigeq   ken vidh,
this  day.LOC to trade_site go.3pPST her foot.GRP

_drigeq_ "they headed for (a place)"


tel  nailaq    enku=F3roreq           i   tark=FCl     Vlam=EDes   satrat=
son.
then see.3sPST make.dirty.DUP.3pPST PRT evil(ones) Vlam=ED.GEN high_place=
.ACC

_enkuorten_ "to make dirty" =3D "to desecrate, to defile"
It's partially reDUPlicated to show continuous action.
_satratsor_ (ACCusative -n absorbs final -r here) means
"a site that has been exalted", namely a throne, an altar,
etc.


"A   vel   dhibios!        Qes   anth qenth?
 VOC among neighbour+COLL  be.3s this what

The particle _a_ is a common vocative mark.
The expression _A vel dhibios!_ is the equivalent of
"Hey, you folks!".


F=FC'lalier  frarenku=F3roratier        fanth satratson,
stop.2pFUT NEG.make.dirty.DUP.2pFUT this  high_place.ACC

The FUTure serves as imperative. Note the verb series,
"You will stop you will not make dirty". I'm looking for
a convincing new way to form imperatives -- the future
tense verbs are loooong...


taus i   gi=F2rr frat=E1dovaqai    ked     kers       fanth satratsor!"
also PRT wrath NEG.focus.3sFUT she.REL be_hers.3s this  high_place

"and she whose altar this is will not focus (her) wrath (on you)"
_taus_ "also, and", and _mi_ "and" are almost freely
interchangeable; _taus_ means "and" only when joining
verbs.


Da      kerr kith    ailtieq.
against she  instead laugh.INFML.3sPST

Here I use the INForMaL mark (just -i- here) on the
verb "laugh". Among strangers, it shows they're making
fun of her in a rude way.


"Dha! Vel   nian elasst frar=E1r    Vlam=ED.
 EXCL among our-  gods   NEG.be.3s Vlam=ED

_nian_ "our (exclusive)"
"Vlam=ED is (stays) not among our gods"


Qes   =FAnfiadhes    mi  tengrutek   b=FCtthes      elvas."
be.3s fool.GRP.GEN and RFX.hate.3p they.REL.GEN goddess

This one was tough. I'm still not sure of that
strange construction for "that of those who=20
hate themselves"


Nan=FC'ftotaq.
make.angry.MV.3sPST

"She got angry": The verb itself etimologically means=20
"to set on fire".


"Sik=E9lav=FCt,     da      sar kith    sirailser       tadh.
 PRF.kind.1sPST against I   instead PRF.laugh.2sACT however

_kith_ is usually used as "instead", but also to
generally contrast things in a broken sequence of
cause-effect.


G=ECn              en sar g=FC'ftotatat onthn."
considering_this by I   do.MV.3sFUT that.ACC

_g=ECn_ is a coining, a merge of _gi anth_ "because of
this" influenced by _g=E8n_ "indeed".
I had no way to translate your verb _zald=ED_...


Enmanaq        b=FCrrn, kram   kiandien =E0qgn     sifarhondanq      b=FC=
d,
take_out.3sPST it.ACC except cut.OBJ  meat.ACC PRF.NEG.use.3sANT it.REL

"She took out that which had not been used except to cut meat."
Was I too literal? Was there a specific word for "knife"?


mi  =EDdhkosaq   enkuortonn.
and stab.3sPST make.dirty.agent.ACC

The verb _=EDdhkosen_ means "to make a cut" in general,
or "to dig a ditch". Graphical, huh?


Aus lif  ken gi=F2rr s=E4q.
out from her wrath go.3sPST

The literal translation _lif ken gi=F2rr s=E4q_ "from her
wrath she went" would be misleading, because _lif_
means both "from" and "based on" in this context.


Well, that's it. Phew! I gotta go eat dinner now...


--Pablo Flores