Re: Poetry Translation Challenge

Using Taliesin's Engl. version for the Kash:
> I am sky and world
> I am moon and sun
> Day watches my work
> Night sings my happiness
> Can you understand?
angasini elokuno

male nele hinda ['male 'nele 'xinda]
male tandi lero ['male 'tandi 'lEro]
lero yatikas mepumi ['lEro ja'tikas me'pumi]
ondre yarinju mindami ['ondre ja'rindZu mín'dami]
aka pole tanjañ? ['aka 'pole 'tandZaN]

añ-kasi-ni elokuno
NOM-begin-poss (name?)

ma-ale nele hinda -- 6 syl, 3 trochees
I-am sky  earth

male tandi lero -- ditto
I-am moon sun

lero ya-tikas mepu-mi -- 8 syl, dactyl-dactyl-trochee
day (or 'sun'!) 3s-see work-my

ondre ya-rinju (=rinju) minda-mi -- ditto
night 3s-sing   happy-my

aka pole tanjañ -- 6 syl., 3 trochees
Q can understand

One omits 'and' whenever possible. Verb stem+poss. > noun is very common, if
verging on colloquial. My first version was more trochaic, but that's not
good Kash poetry; they really prefer dactyls.

Use of verb base+poss > noun is verging on the colloquial, but works better
rhythmically than official "ambepumi, ambindami"

Minor problem: lero ('sun' anim; 'day' inanim.)-- I guess context clears it
up, if it's even necessary